{"product_id":"uzi-crow-murder-drones","title":"Uzi Crow (Murder Drones)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(190, 20, 20);\"\u003eFrom the cold, neon‑lit wastes where rogue drones whisper rebellion into the dark, there comes a feathered fragment of their legend — \u003cstrong\u003eUzi Crow\u003c\/strong\u003e, a soft‑stitched emissary of mischief, grit, and glitch‑born charm.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(190, 20, 20);\"\u003eClad in midnight plumage with stark white markings like warning sigils, this little corvid carries the spirit of Uzi Doorman herself: sharp‑minded, sharp‑tongued, and entirely unwilling to accept the fate assigned to her. The embroidered eye‑sigils glow with that familiar spark of defiance, as though plotting the downfall of some unseen corporate overlord from the safety of your shelf.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(190, 20, 20);\"\u003eUpon its head rests a knitted winter cap — a relic of warmth in a world of frostbitten metal — crowned with a pom‑pom that bobs with every imagined scheme. The stitched emblem at its temple hums with the aesthetic of rogue code and rebellious circuitry, a mark of those who refuse deletion.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(190, 20, 20);\"\u003eThough soft of body and gentle of beak, \u003cstrong\u003eUzi Crow\u003c\/strong\u003e is no mere plush. It is a companion for the outcast, the tinkerer, the plague‑doctor merchant, and any soul who knows that even the smallest creature can carry a revolution in its chest.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"color: rgb(190, 20, 20);\"\u003eA perfect familiar for your Sanctum, your desk, or your traveling reliquary.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"The Plagued Page","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":48485469651136,"sku":null,"price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0730\/0215\/6224\/files\/Murder_Drones_Uzi_Crow2.jpg?v=1782100667","url":"https:\/\/theplaguedpage.com\/products\/uzi-crow-murder-drones","provider":"The Plagued Page","version":"1.0","type":"link"}